This week I did something I’ve never done before. My feet, which are generally planted within my comfort zone, decided to step outside of the fence.
I went to an event by myself. Or as I like to say, I went on a hot date, with myself.
This isn’t necessarily a story about anxiety, it’s more about confidence. But sometimes those two go hand in hand.
I found myself in a situation where I desperately wanted to go to a book launch but didn’t have anyone to go with (first-world-nerd-problems). On the morning of the launch, 6.50am to be precise, I made a decision and bought one single ticket. This might not seem like a big deal to everyone, but I’ve never done anything like this before. I’ve never sat alone in a movie theatre, I’ve never taken myself out for dinner alone. And more often than not, anxious people prefer to have the comfort of human companion and support at public events.
The launch was for a new book (duh) called Not Just Lucky* by the brilliant Jamila Rizvi – writer, media commentator, political whiz, and all round scarily smart woman. She was also going to be joined by the brilliant singer-songwriter/radio host Clare Bowditch, and the night would be hosted by Dr Susan Carland – academic, author and again, scarily smart woman.
I’d been thinking about going for weeks because not only have I followed the work of Jamila for a number of years, I also love Clare Bowditch’s music, and I love listening to any conversation involving Dr Susan Carland. It was basically a triple-whammy of feminist Australian talent.
So off I went. And it was amazing. I sat next to two people I didn’t know. And nothing bad happened. The world did not end.
Afterwards I loitered (not in a creepy way) at the front entrance debating whether I would try to meet Jamila. Feeling confident and pretty pleased with my efforts I got in the line. And I’m glad I did. Most pictures say 1000 words, but this one says precisely three: You go girl.
*I’m 80 pages in and absolutely loving it and convinced that all women must read this book quick smart. I’ll look at posting more about it once I’ve finished.