Today I climbed a mountain…

A week ago I started reducing my medication.

The decision to reduce was not made lightly. I have spent hours of time thinking about it (because, anxiety) and I’ve spent the same amount of time talking about it with my husband. I’m reducing not for a specific reason but because I’ve been feeling really great for a long time, and my doctor and psychiatrist said I could consider reducing to a ‘maintenance dose’. 
The thought of reducing terrified me though. What if I start going down hill? How will I feel? Will there be withdrawal effects? What if this is the worst decision in the whole world and I fail? What if, what if, what if…

Day one and two were probably the worst, with a few physical side effects but it’s now been one week and I’m feeling really good. Why am I writing about this? Because there are too many negative things written on the internet about reducing medication that make people in my position feel worse. Those encounters are valid, but everyone is different and we will all react differently to a reduction. 

Today I climbed a mountain in Tasmania. Ten kilometres, lots of inclines, a fuckload of mud. I guess my point is, if you’re reducing your meds, whether you’re climbing a mountain or climbing into bed, please just back yourself. You’re stronger than you know. I’m stronger than I know.

*I purposefully do not discuss which medication I am on, or the dose, because I do not think that is helpful to the medication conversation. We are all different and our bodies respond differently to different medications. I do not want people to compare themselves to others. Just do you the best you know how. 

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